PUNS FOR EDUCATED MINDS. THIS PUN IS FOR YOU! ROCK ON FROM PARIS. ‘EDUCATED MINDS’….. FRIGHTENING THOUGHT EH????

Humor is intuitive house-cleaning..

Want Less Blog

Puns for Educated Minds

1. The fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference.

He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned

out to be an optical Aleutian.

3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because

it was a weapon of math disruption.

5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be

stationery.

6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for

littering.

7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum

Blownapart.

8. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are

looking into it.

10. Time flies…

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Instant Gratification

Instant Gratification

Change that lasts takes time. We’re taught to expect instant gratification. Diets promise we’ll lose 5-10 lbs a week and be an ideal body in a month. The truth is, it won’t happen. Losing 5-10 lbs by starving yourself now will boomerang and end up around your middle in July.  Aren’t you tired of losing and gaining weight?

Don’t buy into media hype about instant gratification. Since your body is a natural system, it requires time to process change. Only slow progress endures because you’re organic.  Trusting organic change means using determination and trusting your senses.

Because we’re conditioned to “trust” instant gratification, there’s a disconnect from our truth. Instead of responding to conditioning use your 6 senses to stay in the present. The truth is there is no such thing as instant gratification when it comes to long-term physical changes.

You can trust your body.
It’s always focused on healing and creating energy.
Your body is more efficient than the most advanced super-computer.

When you use all 6 senses at mealtime, physical needs and healthy food boundaries become obvious. Real nourishment is only achieved when you’re in sync with yourself. Make a commitment to yourself and use determination to connect with messages from your body at mealtime. Go for real gratification.

Don’t buy into diet hype about the need to eat what you don’t want when you’re not hungry because of a scale or a clock or a book. You have the answers and they are very personal, custom tailored what your body needs. Your body is amazing, alive and constantly evolving.

Use your senses to know your body. Eat intuitively by using the 10 tools. You will learn to recognize when you’re hungry and when you’re not. That’s instant gratification.

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Juiced?

As you recognize your body when you’re hungry, you connect with your mind. Then you know how you want to eat. By respecting your senses, you give your body good energy from your heart through the intuitive balancing connection. That gives you a good feeling about what you’re eating.
Are you juiced? Being juiced is when you really feel alive.  That feeling happens when you tune into your senses.  Here are 2 examples:
Have you ever felt like you were on fire, in a good way?  Have you ever suddenly realized as you walked along that you were smelling flowers blooming, but as you looked for them you couldn’t really see them on the hill, but it didn’t matter. And the smell was everywhere..
That’s a kind of juice- smells, aromas, anticipation, signals, pleasures
Did you ever get in to bed, take a deep breathe in and realize that you are bone tired, and had been too busy to notice, until as you now exhale. Then a second later, the bed is incredibly good, the gentle firm kind of good that that holds you just right, letting your whole spine relax. You can feel it.
That’s a kind of juice- touch, feel, inside and outside of your body, signals, comfort, pleasure, contentment.
Are you juiced now?
No?  Well, if not, perhaps you’re not getting enough sleep.
Did you know that when you get enough sleep, that it’s easier to loose weight? I learned this from an intuitive eater. He said, when you relax your body, your digestive process is healthier.
I asked him how he knew this, and he looked right into my eyes and gave me the kind of smile that made me feel juiced.
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Tricks

Are you being tricked into eating more than you’re really hungry for?

Fifty years ago the average restaurant dinner plate was just 8 inches across. That size plate holds about 140 calories. Today your dinner is probably served on a plate that is 12 inches across (or bigger). That size holds about 350 calories. Even spoons and forks are bigger now then they were.

Yikes- the bigger the plate the more you eat. The bigger the spoon or fork, the more food goes in to your mouth at once. This doesn’t give your stomach much of an option. Ouch.

Another trick that makes us eat more is a huge plate with what appears to be small portions on it. This fools us every time. It’s like trick photography where they show you the same piece of bread on 2 plates. The same piece of bread looks much smaller on the bigger plate. But, it’s a trick! Big plates are deceptive.

If you don’t want to be bigger, consider the up side of using smaller plates and even smaller spoons and forks. Think of it as the easy way for you to achieve portion control. When you downsize your spoon and fork and ask for a smaller plate, you can enjoy conversation and not pay attention to how much you’re eating because your portion will be exactly right- not super-sized.

When you don’t over eat, it makes sense that you will maintain your weight. When it comes to eating, bigger is not better. The way to take control, is to not be tricked by accepting huge plates of food. You have 2 choices- ask for a smaller plate and just put on it what fits, or ask for your plate to be divided. The extra food can be put in a bag to eat another day, or if taking it home is a form of temptation, then give it away.

Eating what you like is an intuitive trick for burning more calories!

Enjoying what you eat at every meal is intuitive. It has been proven that when you enjoy what you eat, your body digests food more efficiently. This means eating what you like, instead of forcing yourself to eat “what is good for you”, actually burns more calories. And obviously, it keeps you happy.
Nice.

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Self-Sabotage

Not using your 6 senses is a form of self sabotage.

When you chose to eat intuitively, you are making the choice to be clear about what you are eating. The tools of your senses give you the skills to do this. Your sixth sense balances messages from your body about hunger with what your senses reveal about your eating choice at the instant you eat your meal.

The habit of not using your senses while judging what you eat, is a form of self- sabotage. This habit is like wearing blinders and earplugs when you go to an event – You really can’t know what’s happening. Passing judgment while you eat is listening to negative thoughts about the past or the future that have no connection with your meal at all. Certainly you are not connecting with your food or enjoying eating.

When we don’t use our senses, we perceive what we’re doing incorrectly. How can you know what you’re eating when you don’t look at your meal, taste it, smell it, or feel it enter your body? Eating is supposed to be sensual. It is intuitive to relax and enjoy your food with your senses. Try it and you will find a smile on your face.

Decide to let go of negative thoughts in your head when you eat. The way to do this is to chose to respect and trust your self and commit to using your senses to enjoy your food. Remember: To respect your self is to protect your self.

This is a new year and a time of new beginnings. Respecting yourself is a combination of trust and honor. Now is a perfect time to respect your self. Really trust your heart, body, mind, and six senses to protect you and let that respect honor who you are when you eat.

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Intuitive Eating, Guts, Balls & Nerve

Guts, Balls, Nerve.. The Intuitive Diet

Guts, balls, nerve, boldness, confidence, all signal courage. These are inside you, and connect with intuitive eating.

Until you fine tune  and respect your senses, the simplest things like eating for health and energy seem like the hardest. Until you smell your food, you will not taste it.Until you see what’s on your plate, you will eat anything.Until you can feel your stomach, you won’t know if you are hungry or not.

All of this is simple. But to change bad habits is not easy.

Being true to your self- while obviously a most valuable and awesome habit, takes courage. Courage is a big word that we throw around. We are not in the habit of thinking about courage when we think about eating, so I will talk about it a lot, because it’s a lot to swallow.

Courage is an energy you are born with. But when you focus on negative thoughts around eating, you are in the habit of ignoring your courage. This is self-sabotage.

What is courage?
Courage is the choice to eat what you intuitively feel is right, despite what others say. It’s something that you use to be true to your whole self as an intuitive eater.  It takes courage to trust your self.

Why?
Because it’s a kind of boldness. When you trust your self, you have the courage to think about how your body feels, what you are sensing, and what you know in your heart – before you make an eating decision.

It takes courage to think about eating intuitively. So please realize- you are being bold as you read this. You are already connecting with your intuition, and it feels good to connect.

The magic thing about courage is that it opens doors. It opens doors to your dreams. Turn the knob, and trust your courage. Walk through the door and you will wonder why it was so hard. That’s life, isn’t it – full of surprise and wonder.

The first step of using courage, with your self as an intuitive eater, is to be willing to receive the messages from your 6 senses, and to be alert to what you feel in your body. Try it.

Eat with courage.

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The Eating Challenge

Intuitive eating stars with an appetite.

It’s natural to use your intuition to lose weight and to maintain a healthy lifestyle. It’s natural to fall in love, get lost, to go through changes, to get up and repeat it again, and it’s natural to fall in step with your self and achieve your weight goals by eating intuitively. This blog is about the beginning of Intuitive Eating. It starts with an appetite and hunger.
It takes courage to maintain your intuitive connection through challenging eating situations.

You may need to eat bread with your meal, or protein, or you may just feel like having yogurt. You may decide that you had such a big lunch that you will just have an appetizer for dinner. Sounds simple, but it takes courage. Courage is when you recognize what you know, and you respect who you are. Courage is following through with what you know and doing what you respect.

Challenging eating situations happen every day. We feel tempted or starved, or like there is no choice, or like pleasing others. The challenge to be true to physical needs, while feeling pressure from stress or from exhaustion, is often the result of not trusting what you intuitively know your body needs.

Take the eating challenge and observe yourself around food. Use your eyes, your ears, taste, touch, and smell. Notice messages from your stomach and notice how you feel in your heart and your head. Fine tune your senses. Listen to your intuition, and recognize habits that end up making you feel badly about your self. When it is time to eat, use your senses to smell, taste, and see what you are eating, and think about how your body feels and what you want for your self. Give your self a chance.

Intuition is a kind of natural courage. Connect with your intuition, and eat only what you know and feel is right. When you tune into your body, and your hunger with courage, you recognize your eating needs. Then you trust your self and take control of feeding your hunger. This is not easy because it’s probably not something that you thought about before. So, give yourself a chance to think. Take a deep breathe in and now breathe out really, really slowly until there is nothing inside. Good.
It takes courage to recognize and trust your self.
It takes courage to stand up for your self.
It takes courage do what is right.
It takes courage to acknowledge what you need.

It takes courage to recognize habits, but if you don’t, you will never be happy with your weight. Ignoring your senses, your body, and what you know, creates a vicious cycle when you eat, and all it takes to stop, is connecting with the courage to follow your truth. Ah yes, that is the eating challenge.

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